“Listen Gonzo, I’m telling you flatly; you can’t sing.”

“Oh, I can sing flatly.”

“Maybe we could sell the show if you wrote in more special effects, like exploding socks.”

“Mr. Cleese, what am I gonna do?”

“Uh, which one are you?”

“I’m the ugly disgusting one who catches cannonballs.” 

“You! Order 28,000 tons of plumber’s putty from Beijing. And you, send the 28,000 tons of silly putty back to Beijing.”

“I hate my life.”

“I hate your life too.”

“If I had a life, I’d hate it.”

“What do these do?”

“Nothing, they’re my nipples.”

….

“Look up! Hey, you wanna make the front pages or not?”

“I’ve been wearing this under my suit every day for years!”

“Gonzo, have you no dignity?”

“Of course not! How long have we worked together?”

“Why are you hopping up and down?”

“Because I’m hoping mad!”